Why is hair okay when it’s attached to someone’s head but not okay when it is hanging out  the back of someone’s pilly sweater or  wrapped around an elastic band?   I get skeeved out finding my own hair in the drain and so does everyone else in my family.  My hair grows like a weed and continuously has to regenerate itself…not my fault, ok?  But this post is not about me and my magic hair nor is it about Sir Donald Trump’s mangy rug although it could have been, given today’s blog title.  

 The hair entry, naturally won last week’s Freak of the Week.  Of course it did.  Hair is gross.  End of story.

 I have a small dilemma and want you to decide who gets today’s Freak of the Week award.  The first one made me throw up in my mouth a little bit and the second one…I am all about the environment and recycling, but isn’t this going a bit far?

• looking for fast pickup
  Bunch of brown thin braids(about footlong each)-can be used for maybe costumes? I think this was part of extensions that were sewn to the head
•  Various colors of candle ends, drippings. . .houselady7

Hit me up on the comments link and cast your vote.

What’s up with all the strange requests from parents?   New Jersey definitely needs more odd children with strange talents, I stand behind that and support it wholeheartedly.  Only problem with this is that we may be setting up our kids to be the brunt of many jokes during their endless time in the school system.  I know all about it…I was one of these kids.  A bug geek in my brother’s hand-me-downs.  Yup.

• Hello,  My daughter wants to learn to play the dulcimer. If you have a dulcimer that you can part with, you would make her very happy. In addition, any dulcimer related material we would be interested in also.
• Hand held, stalk style metal detector wanted for beach combing with my 2 young sons to look for pirate treasure! Many thanks mateys. AARGH….K in Keyport.
• Need a gun rack.  My son collects swords and I knew this was a long shot, but figured I’d try anyway. Thanks.

And let’s not forget this well-meaning dad, who I’ve featured in the past.

Hi everybody, well its summer again and this year 5 of my 8 kids want to learn to ride unicycles….
I know what your thinking, who rides unicycles?!
If anyone has one or 5 laying around drop me a line, thanks
“Octo-Dad”

Been on an extended vacation and have accumulated many strange offers  but have been too lazy to post.  This one, however, made me jump out of my beach bum, beer-swigging stupor.  Extra points go for the mispelling of Hawaiian…doesn’t take anything away from the pork chops’ yumminess, I’m sure.  Freakcycle at its finest.  See you at the dinner table.

Offer: 5-6 cooked Hawaiin style pork chops Very Yummy!- Jackson

I have about 5-6 hawaiin style w/ pineapple & juice cooked pork chops left
over. I made it over white rice & it was delicious.
I am in Jackson near the outlets & will be home all day.

For those of you new to our Freak Circus, there are many posts which leave us wanting more, we want to know the back story.  Here are the newest additions.

• Im ISO an Alcohol Anonymous Book Im in need of it badly and i would sure be appreciated it
• Offer-51″ GigaBall- It’s a big yellow inflatable ball that you can get inside a roll around in. Needs to be used on a flat lawn and not near water. I’d recommend adult supervision when it’s in use. Looks like it would be lots of fun even without letting people get inside.
  Was given to my son as a gag – he’s 18 and over 6 ft, so he’s never used it. New, still in the box.
• Wanted- baby gate for doorway-needed ASAP-Can pickup same day – my toddler has become the escape artist and figured we’d try “gating” him first. Thanks in advance!!
• This is a doggie seatbelt for a large sized dog (I have a 75 lb Doberman). It’s a harness type with a leash clip that connects into your seatbelt. It’s used but it’s in perfect condition. I have 2 seatbelts and only one dog so Happy Freecycling!
  I couldn’t let my neighbor flush his fish when he moved, so we’ve adopted it and stuck it in a pot until we can provide some proper housing.
  If anybody has a small tank and/or equipment that’s not in use, it would do this fish a world of good!
• Offer- Simple Solution Dog disposable diapers-This was a pack of 12, I took out one and realized there was no way my dog was going to keep this on. So the pack is still new, but is missing one. 

I do daily Freecycle searches on Twitter and I gotta say, I may move to Montana and join the Missoula network because there are some true gems here.  Only have the subject lines of their posts but I’m working on joining so I can get the whole posts.  These are the subject lines…can you imagine the descriptions?  Oh, Missoula, let me join, pleeeeeeeaaase.

These were the ones I found just this month…

• [Missoula-Freecycle] Offer: Postcard type photo sets of Polish concentration camps
• [Missoula-Freecycle] Offer – Free horse to a good home – Missoula/Bitterroot
• [Missoula-Freecycle] Wanted – Dog Training Shock Collar – Missoula/Bitterroot
• [Missoula-Freecycle] offer: to bonafide good home, mini gelding
• [Missoula-Freecycle] Offer old broke down picnic table *(no location)
• [Missoula-Freecycle] OFFER: BD brand instant ear thermometer probe cover missoula
• [Missoula-Freecycle] Offer: most of a bunkbed. Missoula
• [Missoula-Freecycle] OFFER: When Good Ghouls Go Bad VHS
• [Missoula-Freecycle] OFFER: Monitor Thing that protects your eyes

I’ve been on a self-imposed vacation this past week but I’ve been bone-tired and kind of cranky.  Of course, this is the week all the freaks come out.  So here you go.  But please, tell me…are these posts annoying or is it just me?

• greetings freecyclers! !!
  i am looking for a futon mattress super clean it is gonna be my as well as my sons bed ( if you could drop off would be great have very small car.  also stud type earring dont have to have backs just small studs
• I am looking for a stackable washer/dryer.. In decent working condition.. Also a Golf Bag Cart… Thanks
• I know these are wish lists and perfume is considered a luxury these days
  with money going to necessities.
  If anyone has any Elizabeth Taylor White Diamonds that they don’t like or want, partial or full, I would like this for my mother in law
  For me if anyone has any Estee Lauder Beautiful regular or sheer, or White
  Linen that they don’t want or use, I would love to take off your hands.
  Willing to try other fragrances but these are what I can tolerate so far
  without getting a headache…LOL.

I think I’m just cranky.

Hi everybody, well its summer again and this year 5 of my 8 kids want to learn to ride unicycles….
I know what your thinking, who rides unicycles?!
If anyone has one or 5 laying around drop me a line, thanks
“Octo-Dad”

Actually what I’m thinking is who has eight kids?  I have two and I’m going insane.

One or five laying around?  Unless you’re a circus troupe it’s highly unlikely you have five unicycles laying around.  Well, we actually do have one in the shed but we’re not giving it up.

But seriously, I absolutely love this post and I totally want to hang out with these people.  This dad is awesome for getting his kids into unicycles and I really hope he finds some for them. 

I got this large size dogloo–a dog house that looks like an igloo–to house some small goats that I intended to get. Instead I got another horse, so no room for the planned goats. Girlfriend says the dogloo has got to go. It is in good condition but could use a wash.

Oh heck, I just wanna Freecycle everything now.  Once the sofa, loveseat and coffee table were gone, I felt liberated. I like my minimalist living room.  Suddenly everything that’s left around my blissful empty space feels like clutter.  I see my kids’ toys and I throw them in the toy box, even if they’re still playing with them.  I’m just kidding.  I don’t do that.  I throw the kid in the box too along with the toy. They like it.  I really am kidding although my friend’s kid jumps into the toy box all the time and he’s okay.

Getting rid of large items via Freecycle  is not that easy.  All Freecyclers know that for every good and reliable pick-up there are at least one or two no-shows.  I know from personal experience that if I respond to a post for an Amish-made, 12-foot cedar cabinet, I better be prepared with my Budget Rent-A-Truck, my husband and one or two foolish friends. You’re giving away free stuff and people flock to your porch, right?  Not always.  There are some ungrateful bastards out there. 

The coffee table got lots of interest, and I wasn’t into giving it away initally so I just ignored all the requests for it until it was clear that I really had to let it go.  It had sat for about two years on my porch after I realized that having a sharp, steel table around babies was a bad idea.  Then last week when we moved the couch onto the porch for someone to pick it up, the table was relegated to the driveway.  I looked out the window one night after a huge thunderstorm and I felt horrible.  I didn’t want it to suffer needlessly through all the rain that has plagued us for weeks so I finally gave it to some Craigslist dude who clearly knew how valuable this table was as he picked it up almost immediately.  Sniff, sniff.

The loveseat, the flowery number up there absolutely had to go.  Our house is pretty eccentric and there is no room for a couch like that in this place.  The only reason it stayed so long was because it had a sweet twin bed in it that my Aunt Yoli slept in every time she stayed over. We also kept it covered with an Indian patterned sheet to camouflage its true identity.

The sofa was ancient but incredibly comfortable.  It’s an Ikea Ektorp sofa and a full sleeper rolled up into one cozy package.  This sofa belonged to my friend Geoff’s parents who gave it to us right before they moved out West.  We were still huge garbage pickers at the time and were thankful that we knew the owners of the couch instead of having to trash pick an item like this.  Many things happen on couches that no one wants to know, right?  At least an Ektorp has a removable, washable cover and we knew the previous owners. 

So many people wanted this sofa yet no one came to pick it up.  I had responses coming in from both Freecycle and Craigslist (I posted it in the Free section) and time and again, the pickup fell through.  I even got into an email volley with some crazy man who worked at the Marina and emailed me at least nine times a day, only to not show up at the scheduled time after three days of emailing back and forth.  Being the girl from Queens that I am, it was very difficult to craft an email that would convey my frustration yet not sound as though I wanted to clock him with my brass knuckles for disrupting my attempts at green living and recycling.  I finally settled on this email:

You had been in touch all morning and afternoon about this couch. You said you were coming to pick up. I took time out of my schedule to return every email and I stayed home from 3 o clock onwards, all for a couch I am getting no money for. If you decided not to take the couch, at least have the courtesy to inform me.

Two days later he countered with:

Hello-
when we were in touch the other afternoon i requested your phone number so i could call you when i was outside.  I never recieved a number and I was outside of your house.  

 Okay…I emailed him back, told him I’d given him my number and asked why he hadn’t rung the bell and POOF, the guy’s a ghost.

Needless to say, the couch was eventually picked up by a lovely Freecycler and that leads me back to my original thought.  Thanks for hanging in there…If you’re on Freecycle and someone chooses you to pick up their junk, hop right into your Prius or whatever and get the beep over there without delay!