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Posts Tagged ‘recycling’

parrothornOurs

HELLLOOOOOO? CAN YOU HEAR MEEEE? JUST FOR THE RECORD, YOU FREECYCLING MASSES OUT THERE…A BULLHORN HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH A BULL. I WILL USE THIS CONTRAPTION TO TELL YOU, IN A WAY THAT YOU CAN UNDERSTAND BECAUSE YOU’RE OBVIOUSLY A DIMWIT, THAT I NEED TO BE HEARD. AT AN OUTDOOR EVENT. WITHOUT ELECTRICITY. LOUDLY.

WANTED: working bull horn in rxd bxxk====Working bull horn for outdoor events that does not have to
be plugged into anything to operate, but will amplify voices.

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Yeah, take that Freecycle and stir it into your tea!  Sure you’ve had a gazillion posts written about you while we’ve been chugging along the track like The Little Engine That Could and you know what?  We are over the mountain with our train full of goodies and we’re nipping at your heels again!  Don’t fall asleep ’cause we’re coming like a thief in the night and pulling the pillow out from under your sleepy head to give to the highest bidder.

Why the bratty gloating?  We got written about by a blog called Our Daily Green.  It’s our new eco-riffic guru.

There are great articles and links about environmental concerns, tips on saving money (on gas too), eye-opening facts about the crap we dump into rivers and other bodies of water, the air, landfills, and ourselves. All good resources to make small changes for a positive impact on our personal ecological footprint.

Kim, the author of this blog can teach you a thing or two about making something out of nothing or something you wouldn’t think of using…like pantyhose cut into strips to string up your plants.  Awesome.  I’ve only used pantyhose to rob banks. I’m kidding.  Feeling a little badass today and it’s getting to my head and making me exaggerate. I only hassled bank tellers to give me my full paycheck in dollar bills.  For my addiction to cheesy strip joints.  Ooops, another fabrication. Gosh, the train is flying off the tracks and I can’t stop.

Okay, back to the ODG site. Check them out if you wanna get schooled on all things green. We’re not only writing about them because they wrote about us but we figured that since you read this blog, you must Freecycle and if you Freecycle, you’ve got some sense of our place in this fragile world and how we shouldn’t just be buying useless junk like a junkie at Target (huh?), using it for a minute or two and then dumping it in the trash.

What?  Are you surprised that under all the snarkiness, beats an honest-to-goodness heart?  It may be shriveled and black but it’s functional and yeah, we care about the environment too!  We’re not just clowns.  We’re clowns with a mission.

Thanks ODG (that’s our gangsta name for you) for sending us some blog love. Besides having a concise and well-written blog about something close to our heart, you obviously have impeccable taste in finding the funny.  We’re Justin Biebering on you too.

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“I can’t help thinking that this would be a better world if everyone would listen to me”– Lucy Van Pelt.  Don’t worry Lucy, we always listen to you, and if you still have your psychiatrist’s booth, we have a new patient for you.

OFFER: bags of concrete-Mxxxxxxxxn- These were bags of concrete that got left in the yard and of course when they got wet they turned solid. Can be used as steppers in yard or broken up and used for decorating garden maybe? There are at least 10 of these.

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These are the freak tweets that we didn’t post the previous Friday because we were preparing our spaceship for the Rapture.
  • Seen on local freecycle “Black metal TV stand”. For a second there I thought it was something awesome- by philipnorton
  • Thanks to the teenagers who so poorly toilet papered our house last night, I have two nice rolls of TP! #freecycle #FTW!- by stetsull
  • “Herbal remedies” offered on Freecycle … says a lot for their effectiveness- by Ffion 1108
  • I’m kinda waiting to see if I’ve secured some Freecycle wardrobes. Then I’m kinda wondering if the men in my life will collect it for me.-kate_librarian
  • Freecycle is insane! So many people after our things, giving me sob stories as to why I should pick them?! This isn’t XFactor people!!- by mostlycaroline
  • When I see women’s clothes being given away by a guy on Freecycle I wonder if he’s disposing of evidence, or has just stopped X-dressing.- by CymruBoyo

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Or if you’d rather not clap, do the finger-snapping poetry thing because you know we’re cool cats.  We wrestled with posting this in our Gallery of Gives and Gets because while we did not get these beauties on Freecycle, we certainly got these for free.  Yup, at a yard sale.  I was at this particular sale for about 20 minutes or so and noticed shoppers walked by this box of hands with a look of horror on their face.

These are high-quality, highly detailed rubber hands that were salvaged from the dump.  They came from a doctor’s office, not a CostumeCity store or ExtremeHalloween. No one wanted them except lil’ ol’ me and since it was my friend Sue’s yard sale, she sent me home with this box.  I love her.

We can justify posting this if we cut you off a piece of the action, though.  On the comments section, leave the most imaginative use for these hands in the form of a Freecycle request  (no Halloween decoration suggestions…too obvious) and we’ll send you one via snail mail.  Contest ends on June 3rd so hurry and get your handy posts in!

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Just because we’re quite comfortable using the sarcasm stick to make fun of Freecycling buffoons does not mean that we don’t have wants, needs, and desires that are worthy of a guffaw or two.

The Internet Gods say that in order to give good blog, you must be able to be vulnerable, put yourself out there a bit, and give personal and compelling information from time to time in order to connect and grab your readers.

Here it is people…wait for it, waiit for it…

We’re greedy bastards.  That’s it.

Okay, we love puppies and unicorns too, but that’s for a post-Rapture post, if we’re not chosen to ascend. (Please God, take us, they know about the unicorn stuff now).

We figured heck, since the end of the world is upon us, why not hover opportunistically over the Freecycle forums like a circle of vultures over a 3 day-old whistle-pig corpse? We stand just as good a chance as anyone of getting a few of the items on our wish list since the end of the world is upon us, no?

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I didn’t think it would ever happen but it finally farkkin’ly has!  Freecycle is volleying one to their darker, stranger, and dare we say more interesting compadre Freakcycle.  Yes.

We’ve documented many petty jealousies, competitions, and grumblings about our world-recognized nemesis but one of their moderators is tossing us a biscuit…tiny, stale and a tad gnawed around the edges but thank you Freecycle all the same.  

All you Debbie Downers on Freecycle, quit your bellysniping about used catheters, tires, grandma’s old teeth and peculiar animal bits. Someone besides us wants them too.  

Hi everyone,

i’m sure many people had thoughts about used underwear, whether
privately or publicly. i’d like to ask that we move past this and
also ask that people report problems to the mods–there’s no need to
argue on the message board.

We are a large, diverse group in one of the world’s largest and most
diverse cities. We are united by our desire to see less waste in our
city, and our ability to maintain this gifting system relies on our
ability to be respectful towards one another.

With regard to what’s appropriate to post or not, we all have our
limits on what we’ll reuse. Every post about underwear reaps a
few “ewww” comments to the mods, but i’ve seen ’em on sale in thrift
stores and i know a lot of ladies on this list appreciate the bras
that are given away (they’re expensive)! In the same way one might
see a taxidermied animal as offensive while another sees it as a
kitschy stage prop, let’s understand that we all have needs and
limits. If you don’t want it, skip over it, but if it can be reused
and help someone out, is it for us to judge?

Yes, there are things that are inappropriate for this list–drugs,
adult movies, etc and the mods work to enforce those rules. But if
our goal is to reduce the enormity of Nxx Xxxx’s waste, let’s foster,
not stifle that mission.

Thanks!

cxxxxxxxa
(a moderator)

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